Just before Christmas, I left Marshall and the boys at home in bed and drove out to my parent's home. They live out in a suburb where the roads are long, winding and dark. I went out to welcome my older sister, Kyra and her boys who just got into town to visit (remember?) We chatted and snacked on goodies and when it got too late, I packed up and headed home to get to bed. I was just 3 minutes away from their home and noticed that as I drove on these dark, winding roads- that up ahead it looked as though there was a pickup truck driving in my lane and coming head on- FAST. I don't see well in the dark and couldn't quite tell if my eyes were playing tricks on me or if what I saw was actually happening. I squinted my eyes and talked myself into what to do next. I knew that if I swerved to the right I would slide on the ice and roll into the ditch because of how fast I was driving and really could put myself in danger OR I could go into the left lane where the pickup could eventually move into or actually be in and hit them head on and things would end terribly. As I looked ahead, the truck was coming closer and I knew I had to do something. I took a deep breath and shut my eyes tight as I panicked in my last minute decision, I thought in that instant that I already knew that I was going to hit this truck head on. I knew that I would be leaving my family asleep in their beds,my parents and sisters and everyone else that I loved here on Earth while I passed on to the other side with the sweet unborn baby that I carried. I opened my eyes as the headlights shone bright into my eyes as the truck made its way even closer and faster at me, I even thought, "Oh my gosh, this is it!"--- flashes of my children's faces flashed through my mind, I imagined the touch of my husband's hand on my cheek and I tried hard to remember the things I said to everyone that I saw last. I was then blinded by the lights of the truck as it came within feet of my van, and at the last miraculous minute, the truck swerved into the other lane while I clenched the steering wheel and caught my breath. I came up to the next stop light and my whole body shook and I didn't want to put my foot on the accelerator and drive the rest of the way.
I repeatedly sent mighty prayers of gratitude to Heaven for my life being spared and for being protected. All I wanted was to go home and hold my family. As I timidly drove the remainder of the way, thoughts ran through my mind of what could have been my funeral, my husband who could have been left without a mother for his children and a wife to hold at night. And I was suddenly washed over with the peace that we are a forever family- that we would be together again if anything had happened to me. As someone of the latter day saint faith, we believe in this
Maybe a little heavy for a weekend posting?
Let me lighten the mood with some fun facts from our week:
- Pregnancy is still going well- every once in a while I get a little achy in my hips, and back but I am working on strengthening my back with some exercises at the gym and it is helping! I am getting so excited to meet this baby. I don't feel like I have been experiencing as many braxton hicks as I did with my last pregnancies, so that has kept my mind at ease. I do feel like my belly is out of control and much larger than before, too. I am going to need to get creative on clothes that will fit this new body of mine.
-The boys have had the worst cold this week- boogers. boogers. everywhere.
-This is the first week that I actually lived by and did EVERYTHING on my weekly cleaning list. I posted this list on my wall months ago and always looked at it like it was a good idea, but actually did it this week. MY HOUSE IS SO CLEAN! Every day I tacked a different task and although it was hard this week and there was a lot of deep cleaning that needed to be done, I know if I do this every week, my house won't be so dirty. I am seriously embarrassed by the amount of dirt and dust and cobwebs that our house had! I had no idea it was so bad until I got in there! It was good to have the boys helping me wash the windows and throw old food away that were hidden in the fridge and all sorts of other dirty jobs. I love teaching my boys how to clean.
-Somewhere down the line, time outs for Ezra disappeared. But the last two weeks we have reintroduced them. Ezra will tell you it is the worst thing in the world. and for him, it probably is. But it's been good for him. Eli also gets time outs when he is not listening or did something he isn't supposed to. I am raising good men over here, people! This is what it takes!
- The car sat dead in the driveway most of the week. I did leave one day- but we still haven't had time to replace the battery and luckily I didn't have to go anywhere.
- We have decided to keep Ezra home in the fall instead of sending him to his little preschool that he has been attending once a week. He said that he didn't want to leave Eli and the baby. So, instead. I will be homeschooling Ezra and Eli in the fall all week long. The money that it would cost to send Ezra will be used in more adventurous ways. We plan on a little educational trip once a week and other classes or materials that are offered through the community or online. The thought of Ezra being in kindergarten in 2016 is making me nervous and Marshall and I are still praying about whether or not to send him or not. So far, we are keeping him home. But we will see....Life will be a little crazier in a few months.
- When Eli roars and runs after Ezra, I can't help but laugh because it is obvious that Ezra gets scared of his little brother. It makes me proud to watch Eli be the Alpha for a change.
- The basement still isn't done. That is all I will say.
- I have been sticking to my guns about not making the boys anything else than what I originally make for dinner. Sometimes they go to be hungry or mad and wake up early and other nights they give in
and try what I have made. I am not letting up on this one, although, it has been harder to do on my own. We miss not having Marshall home for dinner.
-Marshall told me this week that I am organized. I have actually never thought of myself as an organized person but when he told me this, I believed him! I think I AM organized. It's fun to learn new things about yourself- especially from someone else.
Have a great weekend!